Wednesday, October 16, 2002
blogon
New York Fashion Blog
This blog is a manifestation of a new trend - commercial entities setting up weblogs to attract audiences.
In this case it's the fashion website lookonline.com. Its writers contribute snippets about their glamorous clothes-obsessed lives and offer peeks behind the scenes at New York fashion shows.
It even includes some genuine bitching about seat allocation at the shows: "Shalil Upadaya, who was the center of attention by the paparazzi a year and a half ago (solely because he came decked out in outlandish outfits in black and white and animal prints ... all of his own design), has absolutely NO press credentials, and is not even a fashion designer ... is not only allowed into the tents, gaining access to almost every show, but gets a GOOD seat to boot!"
Only on a site like this could you find the phrase "important necklines" used without a trace of irony.
Gina Snowdoll
When someone lists their hobbies as "Music ... Playing guitar, and making music. Transvestism" you would expect a blog out of the ordinary.
Given "Gina Snowdoll's" interests, it's no surprise that she adores David Bowie and cried at his London concert. For the serious clothing bit, click on the link labelled "Tales of Crossdressing". There's a lot more to it than descriptions of what was worn ("long elegant velvet black dress, and pointed suede stilettos with gold straps"), but enough to qualify as an unusual fashion blog.
Primp!
Wanna be girly? This blog invites trivial obsessions of all kinds: bags, hats, jewellery shoes, it's all grist to the personal-adornment mill.
Some of the posts read a bit like ads, but close-ups of Tina's latest home-made handbag redeem those a little.
And sometimes well-aimed ads are what readers want anyway, as every glossy magazine knows; you can find sock sites, Web shop sales and the odd second-hand designer bag through this blog.
SheSheMe
Commercial blogs seem to abound in the world of fashion: SheSheMe is the fictional story of an archetypal fashion victim, loosely based on the lives of the mostly female team behind the site.
She buys $400 shoes (that'll be in US dollars) and cannot concentrate on conversations with attractive men because of her obsessive clothing-related thoughts.
Be warned: most of the hyperlinks in the daily posts are to sites selling the products that feature in each post.
It might tide you over until Sex and the City returns to TV.
New York Fashion Blog
This blog is a manifestation of a new trend - commercial entities setting up weblogs to attract audiences.
In this case it's the fashion website lookonline.com. Its writers contribute snippets about their glamorous clothes-obsessed lives and offer peeks behind the scenes at New York fashion shows.
It even includes some genuine bitching about seat allocation at the shows: "Shalil Upadaya, who was the center of attention by the paparazzi a year and a half ago (solely because he came decked out in outlandish outfits in black and white and animal prints ... all of his own design), has absolutely NO press credentials, and is not even a fashion designer ... is not only allowed into the tents, gaining access to almost every show, but gets a GOOD seat to boot!"
Only on a site like this could you find the phrase "important necklines" used without a trace of irony.
Gina Snowdoll
When someone lists their hobbies as "Music ... Playing guitar, and making music. Transvestism" you would expect a blog out of the ordinary.
Given "Gina Snowdoll's" interests, it's no surprise that she adores David Bowie and cried at his London concert. For the serious clothing bit, click on the link labelled "Tales of Crossdressing". There's a lot more to it than descriptions of what was worn ("long elegant velvet black dress, and pointed suede stilettos with gold straps"), but enough to qualify as an unusual fashion blog.
Primp!
Wanna be girly? This blog invites trivial obsessions of all kinds: bags, hats, jewellery shoes, it's all grist to the personal-adornment mill.
Some of the posts read a bit like ads, but close-ups of Tina's latest home-made handbag redeem those a little.
And sometimes well-aimed ads are what readers want anyway, as every glossy magazine knows; you can find sock sites, Web shop sales and the odd second-hand designer bag through this blog.
SheSheMe
Commercial blogs seem to abound in the world of fashion: SheSheMe is the fictional story of an archetypal fashion victim, loosely based on the lives of the mostly female team behind the site.
She buys $400 shoes (that'll be in US dollars) and cannot concentrate on conversations with attractive men because of her obsessive clothing-related thoughts.
Be warned: most of the hyperlinks in the daily posts are to sites selling the products that feature in each post.
It might tide you over until Sex and the City returns to TV.
tenant letter, bowdlerised for privacy: bet this goes down like a ton of bricks. lease is up February 10.
17/10/2002
Dear M,
Please find enclosed a cheque for the materials used for installing the stove. The invoices you provided total $260.74, including GST, which was applied at the cash register. If you need copies back, I can provide them. If there were other materials, please forward invoices for those, or if that's not possible, a statement of materials and cost.
If you decide to resubmit an invoice for labour costs, please itemise hourly costs, dates of work etc.
Please also advise me, in writing, if an electrician was engaged to carry out the actual connections, as I requested. I'd like a receipt or written notice from the electrician, if possible; if an electrician was not used, the wiring will have to be professionally examined.
I'd like to outline the reasons why I believe I did not engage you formally to carry out this work. I believed we made an arrangement that was mutually agreeable, partly at your instigation.
As you may recall, I contacted you about getting access to the property to check stove cavity dimensions. We then began a conversation that day, and on the day I purchased the stove, which developed into the agreement I believe we had.
There were a number of factors, in no particular order, that led to my belief and I'd ask you to consider.
You expressed a disinclination to having workmen in the property, and a preference to do the work yourself . During an earlier formal inspection visit, the matter of bathroom tiling was discussed, and you and (L). indicated you would rather do it yourselves. You had already carried out (unauthorised) works on the flat, involving attaching shelving to walls, which led me to believe you were open to doing such work.
We discussed my paying for materials specifically, with no mention of labour. I mentioned I'd need the original invoices for tax purposes, which to me implies that the arrangement was for me to reimburse you, not pay you as a tradesman. Your company and business were never mentioned as a vehicle for this work. In fact, I didn't even know its name until yesterday.
Other parts of our conversation - I said something like "if you want to do it yourself, that's great", and you certainly said something about wanting it to be done properly, as opposed to how it might be done if I employed a third party - led me to believe that doing it yourself, at your leisure, was what you wanted. No quote was given, or hourly labour rate discussed.
Shortly after the arrangement was made, you requested a further one-year lease, reinforcing my impression that you were simply committed to the property. On that basis, I instructed (agents) to reduce the proposed $10/week rent increase on the lease to $5/week.
You participated in the purchase decision on the actual stove, and I certainly believed we were making an arrangment to fit your needs, rather than me "employing" you. I would point out that some of the work, eg the fan-hood, was due to your requesting such a feature.
If I had not believed you had made the offer to do the work, I would have found a different solution to the oven problem. I probably would not have employed a skilled furniture maker such as yourself, but would have bought a simpler appliance, found an older secondhand oven that fitted the cavity, or employed a commercial kitchen company or carpenter, or similar. I certainly would have obtained several quotes. A total of nearly two and half thousand dollars is well outside the budget I had for that repair, and as you're aware, the flat needs further work, most urgently the bathroom retiling and shower membrane.
Whatever you may believe, I would not have "expected" anyone to work for free. I genuinely believed an offer was made. It's not unusual for landlords to pay for materials and tenants to do the work, as I've done myself in painting a rented property. I can't quote the exact words, but I'm certain that when we were walking back from Retravision to the property on the day we chose the oven, I was aware of the possibility of a misunderstanding of this nature and said something like "do you want me to pay you something for this" and you declined. Obviously I can't prove that. As I said on the phone, I wonder that you would assume I'd authorised an open cheque for this work. While, as you point out, you said you'd keep it as cheap as possible, I believe (I may be wrong) I remember asking what materials might cost and receiving an answer that was reasonably low, and nothing like the total invoice you've presented me with.
This is what my (electronically datestamped) journal notes from December 28, 2001 say, in part. :
"I can report a (fairly) satisfactory solution to the Great Oven Dilemma.
I have a mortgage on a flat ... It's about 35 years old, and so are all the fittings.
so, inevitably, it needed a new oven. the tenants had complained, so I went shopping at the sales. turns out that they don't make ovens that size any more - the space available is way too shallow.
damn, bother, etc. So I called the agents, who gave me the tenants' number, hoping I could get in there and measure up and talk to them about whether they wanted to put up with cabinetmakers etc traipsing through, meanwhile panicking about the cost of all this.
turns out the guy who lives there is a furniture maker. I went to see him this morning, we stood in the kitchen, chatted, discussed, measured, discovered we have some mutual friends, wandered up to the whitegoods store, measured some more; the upshot is I've put a deposit on a reasonably cheap but good quality (on sale) oven and gas range, and he's going to take care of the fitting-it-in problem. then I only have to get an electrician/plumber in to install it all and pay for the materials. bonus!
the tenant is a pretty good furniture maker too, from the look of what he has there and the jobs he says he's working on; ..."
Nothing in the intervening period has changed the belief I held about our arrangement, until I received your invoice.
I regret the misunderstanding, and hope we can find a solution. If you choose to submit a further invoice or claim for materials, could you do so in the next two weeks please?
well, so much for this
almost a year later, I get the "receipts" - turns out the tenant has been assuming I'll pay him $700 in labor to install an oven. as if. obviously I can't really afford to be a landlord. we had a discussion where he accused me of expecting him to "work for free", where all I thought was that he didn't want workmen in his flat. there's a great tradition of landlords providing materials and tenants doing the work when they feel like it - normally it's things like painting, but in this case this is where his skills lay.
truth is, if I knew it was going to be 2 1/2 thousand, I'd have bought a cheap upright - or not fixed the oven at all, given the low rent it's bringing in. it wasn't worth a kitchen remake, which seems to be what he's done.
sigh. I've written to him - including, in part, that blog entry, how useful to have a diary! but expect he'll bill me again, I'll pay and I'll just sell the bloody thing next year. too much trouble. the bathroom needs work too...
almost a year later, I get the "receipts" - turns out the tenant has been assuming I'll pay him $700 in labor to install an oven. as if. obviously I can't really afford to be a landlord. we had a discussion where he accused me of expecting him to "work for free", where all I thought was that he didn't want workmen in his flat. there's a great tradition of landlords providing materials and tenants doing the work when they feel like it - normally it's things like painting, but in this case this is where his skills lay.
truth is, if I knew it was going to be 2 1/2 thousand, I'd have bought a cheap upright - or not fixed the oven at all, given the low rent it's bringing in. it wasn't worth a kitchen remake, which seems to be what he's done.
sigh. I've written to him - including, in part, that blog entry, how useful to have a diary! but expect he'll bill me again, I'll pay and I'll just sell the bloody thing next year. too much trouble. the bathroom needs work too...
Tuesday, October 15, 2002
wonder if this is working?
anyway, most annoying quote of the day was someone from foreign affairs who told a journalist that despite the US having issued warnings about going to tourist spots and clubs this week - and Bali being considered a high risk area as well - Australia's officials "didn't know".
sure, they may not have had a call from the FBI. but it was on their (US foreign affairs) frickin' web site, for frick's sake.
would it be hard to look at that every frickin' day or so?
and if a warning had stopped even one person from going to the bar that night?
anyway, most annoying quote of the day was someone from foreign affairs who told a journalist that despite the US having issued warnings about going to tourist spots and clubs this week - and Bali being considered a high risk area as well - Australia's officials "didn't know".
sure, they may not have had a call from the FBI. but it was on their (US foreign affairs) frickin' web site, for frick's sake.
would it be hard to look at that every frickin' day or so?
and if a warning had stopped even one person from going to the bar that night?
Monday, October 14, 2002
well of course the US press are ignoring us. don't they always? so much for our good-friend status. has W even called little Johnny? probably not. no, all the US will do is use it as an excuse to bomb Iraq, inflaming the situation.
sick. according to Google, Hillary Clinton is the most beautiful woman in the world.
via some fishy page I stumbled across.
via some fishy page I stumbled across.
here's the math: if there are 280 million Americans and they lost 3000 people on September 11, and only 20 million Australians and we lost 150 or so in Bali - there are 220 missing - then September 11 killed about .00107 per cent of the US population, and Bali .00075 per cent. if it's 200 in Bali, which seems likely, it's .001, or almost exactly the same proportion.
Sunday, October 13, 2002
I don't know what to say about what happened in Bali.
I didn't hear about it until I turned on the radio at 8 on Sunday night.
it's all so pointless.it seems no Muslim country is now safe for Westerners. no way I'd be going to Morocco now.
and the victims interviewed on the radio this morning all had such Australian names: Gavin and Scott from Adelaide, talking about the smell and people missing bits. A 9/11 flashback if there ever was. is that smell the hallmark of this "war"?
I didn't hear about it until I turned on the radio at 8 on Sunday night.
it's all so pointless.it seems no Muslim country is now safe for Westerners. no way I'd be going to Morocco now.
and the victims interviewed on the radio this morning all had such Australian names: Gavin and Scott from Adelaide, talking about the smell and people missing bits. A 9/11 flashback if there ever was. is that smell the hallmark of this "war"?
batty always finds the weirdest sites: like the Prior-Art-O-Matic:
osama bin laden is a wastepaper basket that has sleek curves! It knows your name and responds to ambient light changes.
then I tested it on my household members:
jenny is a fizzy drink that sorts your mail, can disable electrical hardware and hovers three feet from the ground.
andrew is a CD-rom that hums incessantly, follows a target of your choice and produces 240v of electricity.
bilbo is like a normal airbag, but it can be used in zero-gravity.
strangely accurate, really.
osama bin laden is a wastepaper basket that has sleek curves! It knows your name and responds to ambient light changes.
then I tested it on my household members:
jenny is a fizzy drink that sorts your mail, can disable electrical hardware and hovers three feet from the ground.
andrew is a CD-rom that hums incessantly, follows a target of your choice and produces 240v of electricity.
bilbo is like a normal airbag, but it can be used in zero-gravity.
strangely accurate, really.
Saturday, October 12, 2002
speaking of poetry (or not)
Google poetry generator (via Jill)
- elephant - a :: i'm
! danger love!
Blog Commonplace Commonplace Poetry is shampoo? with dickinson
syndrome Smiq.com is - McStyles? elephant i'm Mike's
Mike's Commonplace ...
(?) shampoo? --- with Smiq.com antigeneric.net/blog
mad (?) Smiq.com antigeneric.net/blog
is syndrome dickinson ---
:: danger ... orbyn danger McStyles?
Google poetry generator (via Jill)
- elephant - a :: i'm
! danger love!
Blog Commonplace Commonplace Poetry is shampoo? with dickinson
syndrome Smiq.com is - McStyles? elephant i'm Mike's
Mike's Commonplace ...
(?) shampoo? --- with Smiq.com antigeneric.net/blog
mad (?) Smiq.com antigeneric.net/blog
is syndrome dickinson ---
:: danger ... orbyn danger McStyles?
last night we went to see the fireworks.
and to quote a small child who was standing near us, they were "craptacular".
during the week we received a notice warning us to lock up our cats and dogs (funny, as we have no cats) due to a fireworks display off the Beaumaris pier on Saturday night.
so, we thought, fireworks. they're good. and duly had dinner nearby and went and stood on the clifftops at 9pm, waiting. waiting. waiting.
half an hour after the set time, when I was about ready to push the annoying whiny British-accented kids on our left over the cliff, there was a huge "whoosh" and it appeared that a fence had caught fire.
then some small sparks appeared in the sky, accompanied by popping sounds.
and I began to realise why, as Andrew said later, public-sector fireworks are the go. (these were apparently wedding fireworks for a reception in the nearby yacht club).
oh look, it wasn't that bad really. there were some cute little ones that exploded, then whizzed around individually like fish (or sperm, as one mature woman nearby noted). And some really loud bangs and flashes.
but worth rearranging our night for? and the half-hour wait? nah. craptacular.
and to quote a small child who was standing near us, they were "craptacular".
during the week we received a notice warning us to lock up our cats and dogs (funny, as we have no cats) due to a fireworks display off the Beaumaris pier on Saturday night.
so, we thought, fireworks. they're good. and duly had dinner nearby and went and stood on the clifftops at 9pm, waiting. waiting. waiting.
half an hour after the set time, when I was about ready to push the annoying whiny British-accented kids on our left over the cliff, there was a huge "whoosh" and it appeared that a fence had caught fire.
then some small sparks appeared in the sky, accompanied by popping sounds.
and I began to realise why, as Andrew said later, public-sector fireworks are the go. (these were apparently wedding fireworks for a reception in the nearby yacht club).
oh look, it wasn't that bad really. there were some cute little ones that exploded, then whizzed around individually like fish (or sperm, as one mature woman nearby noted). And some really loud bangs and flashes.
but worth rearranging our night for? and the half-hour wait? nah. craptacular.
Friday, October 11, 2002
see, this is what happens when you file nine days ahead of time. Sapphire Blue is alive, and snarky about it, too.
I might have to do resuscitated blogs. born-again blogs. or just plain snarky blogs. snarky. cute word.
I might have to do resuscitated blogs. born-again blogs. or just plain snarky blogs. snarky. cute word.
a small ode to the marsupial which narrowly avoided killing itself under my front right-hand tyre as I left BQAGS (or is it BGS?) last night:
Suicide possum
wanting to die
suicide possum
I don't know why
suicide possum
how would it feel?
suicide possum
with you under my wheel?
DON'T DO IT!
(also for Patrice, who claimed to find poetry in my blog, and of course for uber-marsupial lover and victim of suicide roadkill, Batty)
The actual speech part of the night? Well, my old teacher mentioned my blog and Google in her thanks, so I can't say too much, as I expect I will be having Visitors.
But speaking to a room full of teenage girls - and being seated next to the actual headmaster - is not exactly relaxing, you understand.
and of course, teenage girls can't be told; the very idea is absurd.
here's my speech; it's got some reminder key phrases in capitals through it that I can't be bothered editing out right now. about to make a 35-k trek to see some friends across town - and to rescue my poor underwatered pot plants, which are no doubt 97% dessicated after a week without rain.
-THANKS
thanks/address: principal, Mrs O'Shea, teachers, parents and students.
Formalities over, I'm now going to ignore the staff and parents altogether and talk to the girls. I'm going to explain to you why your parents are completely wasting their money on your school fees.
-SUNSCREEN SONG
Some of you might be expecting something like the Sunscreen Song, which goes "class of 97, Wear sunscreen. If I could offer you only one tip for the future, sunscreen would be it. "
In fact, that was a pretty good speech, and I wish I could give it.
- ORIGINAL
But unfortunately, Patrice has asked me to come up with something original.
Actually, I'm still wondering why she did ask me to speak tonight.
- THE POINT OF ME
-pay attention
-was like you
I suppose the point of guest speakers at school events like this it that they are neither your parents nor your teachers, the idea being that you might actually pay attention to me
And the point of asking an "old girl" to speak is that 19 years ago I was a student here, presumably just like you.
-what not to do?
So maybe I'm supposed to provide some insights into where you might go and how to get there; or perhaps I'm exhibit A: here's what NOT to do.
I'm not sure how good an example I'd make anyway. Most likely all of you were born since I was last here, although I notice we have a few things in common, including Patrice.
- PAST 19 YEARS
What I've done in that 19 years includes five years as a technology journalist on The Age, about the same time writing for inner-city Melbourne papers in St Kilda, Fitzroy and Melbourne city, a bit of freelance writing, picking up arts degrees from RMIT and Melbourne University, travelling to about 15 or 20 countries (the exact number depends on whether you count Wales and Scotland and overnight stops), working in shearing sheds, a couple of brushes with the law (all at least 15 years ago) and
-YOUR OBLIGATIONS & HOW TO GET THERE
That's just for context; this isn't about me. It's about you. Other speakers tonight and through your lives will remind you that you have obligations to the wider community, to give something back from your relatively privileged positions, but I'm interested in how you'll get yourselves into a position to do that.
- a bit girly?
Patrice told me the topic for the guest speaker at your annual dinner was normally something "a bit girly", often about the co-educational experience.
- not thinking about feminism/busy being smart
Feminism is not necessarily the first thing on your minds; and I'm very glad for you that it doesn't have to be. In fact, research – and my memory of school - suggests that most of you are probably too busy being smarter and more mature than the boys your age to even think about feminism, and you may expect that to go on being the case.
-not always enough
I hope it does, but you may also find that smarter and better aren't always enough.
-fight, give in or walk away
Being female can still mean you are treated differently in a lot of situations. When that happens, you have three options: fight, give in and conform, or walk away.
- eg papers vs TV/ ACA
Being female is one reason I'm a newspaper journalist and not on TV, where I would spend more time on worrying about how I looked than what I was reporting, for instance, as I discovered when I worked as a part-time researcher on A Current Affair at Channel Nine in the late 1980s.
Still, being female isn't the only source of existential difficulty; in fact it's pretty minor when it comes to the bigger problem of being yourself.
-2022: speaking to a dinner and what will matter. not what you think.
Incredible as this might seem now, in 2022 each of you will be a Grammar "old girl", 20 years older in fact, looking back at your 2002 self. And if you're really unlucky you may even be speaking to a new batch of students at a Krome House dinner about how you fared over that 20 years.
Whatever the people around you might tell you to do, or be, now, however much you might care right now whether boys like you or not, what you weigh now, what clothes you wear now, what your marks are now, ….. the only thing that will make that experience tolerable for you is to have been true to yourselves.
-fees so you can do what you want
Your parents have – I hope – stumped up Grammar's not insignificant fees for the right reasons – not so you can be a doctor or a lawyer, but so you have the greatest possible chance of being able to do whatever you want with your lives. And to that end you, probably pay a lot of attention to your marks.
- what marks can do for you
In HSC in 1983, as it was then, my end of year mark – now a TER – was the second-highest in the class. I was supposed to go straight to Melbourne Uni and do law or something. I didn't; I spent three years hanging around Ballarat driving my parents to despair. It took those three years to work out what it was I needed and understand how to get it. Actually, that's not true. I'm still working out what I need and how to get it.
-figuring out where to go
Some of you are very lucky: you already know exactly what you want to do with your lives. Fewer again know exactly how to get there and that they have the talent, intelligence and inner resources to walk that path.
Others of you are yet to figure out what will suit you best. You may be being bombarded with career choices, information on what people "do" in different jobs, what the pay is and how good or bad the working conditions are.
But before you even think about all that, or any other decision you're faced with, you have to know what shape peg you are. If you're an artist-shaped peg, the best marks in the world are still no reason at all for going to medical school. If you really care about people and are fascinated by biology and curing diseases, you need to find a way to work with that, even if your exam results aren't that good.
-girls in technology
One of the stock stories that I trot out when I can't think of anything else to write about, is the "why don't girls study technology" yarn. I've been writing it for nearly six years now.
-underrepresented
It goes something like this: In Australia, women are hugely underrepresented in computing and communications technology work, and the "harder" or more objectively scientific the work, the fewer women you'll find. The numbers of women studying these subjects has actually gone down over recent years, while in equally left-brain fields, like engineering, the male-to- female ratio is now about 50:50.
- compared to overseas
This is a Western phenomenon; in countries like Malaysia, girls are actively encouraged to take up these high-paying, white-collar and in-demand roles, and they're very good at them.
- year 9 dropouts ... boys ... not looking too smart
It's also an age-related thing; in Australia, girls tend to drop out of computing studies around years 9 and 10 . I don't know how things are here at Grammar, but one reason for that happening is thought to be that the boys hog the computer labs, or that old chestnut, that "smart" girls aren't considered attractive or cool.
-don't let it happen here if that's what you want
I hope it doesn't happen here, but if it does, and if you think you'd like to spend more time programming, or learning to set up networks, or working out how to make databases do clever tricks, you should do it no matter waht. I'm not saying you should all go off and enrol in programming 101 tomorrow morning. If you find it boring, or just get much more excited about plants, dogs or architecture, by all means do that.
-same for everything; what gets you going?
The same principles apply; if it interests you, if it can make you stay up an extra hour to solve that problem or finish that piece of work, then it could be what you are here for. And if that thing happens to be a bit more domestic, like making your family your first priority, you're allowed to do that too.
- change your mind
And – here's a very girly bit – if you change your mind halfway through, that's perfectly fine too. It's still a woman's prerogative to change her mind, and it should be a man's too.
- attributions of success
Here's another random snippet of research I picked up somewhere: in general, when men succeed they take full credit, and when they fail, they blame outside factors. In women, it's the opposite: when they fail, they often blame themselves, while success is put down to luck or outside help. The result is not just stronger male egos; it's greater willingness to try scary things, because if they fail, it's not really their fault, is it?
- you get lots of help... school and family...and high expectations.
Being at Ballarat Grammar means you're getting a lot of outside academic help with your studies, and what's called pastoral support from your house. It's not accidental that the houses are divided along gender lines, either.
And whatever the ups and downs, you're getting a lot of help from your families – there's those fees again – but more importantly there's the home environment that lets you grow and study and most likely test yourselves out against your parents' standards. There's the expectations, too – positive in that they push you harder, but potentially negative if you feel you have to live up to something that isn't you.
- but it's still your life...light bulb joke
For all that help, your life is still entirely yours. Nothing I say, or your parents say, or the teachers say, is going to make any difference to who you really are.
It's like that old light bulb joke: How many social workers does it take to change a light bulb? Only one, but the light bulb has to WANT to change.
- art and definining your own success/potential.
- which fees can't buy
If you fail or succeed, it may be due to outside factors or not. When I was here in the early 80's, I studied art – I was terrible at making art but I enjoyed it – and one thing stuck with me. We were taught that although we might like or not like a piece of art, we also had to try to understand it from the point of view of the artist – what he or she was trying to achieve.
No one else could define that for them; it was their art, whether or not other people saw it the same way. Your lives are the same; when you're an "old girl" you'll find you care less and less about what other people think, but more about meeting your own standards and fulfilling your own potential, as you choose to define it.
Which is something no amount of school fees can buy; you have to do it for yourself.
- last year's VCE - St Kevin's - willing to do the work, and cared about his marks.
Last year's top VCE result went to a boy who was, admittedly, at St Kevin's college in Toorak; but he was on a scholarship and it took him an hour and a half to get to school every day. To me, that says he was willing to do the work that was needed, regardless of his circumstances. It also means that he must have cared about his VCE results an awful lot.
- ignore me, but trust me on the sunscreen.
And, as that song said, you should be careful about whose advice you take. so feel free to ignore me.
But trust me on the sunscreen
Suicide possum
wanting to die
suicide possum
I don't know why
suicide possum
how would it feel?
suicide possum
with you under my wheel?
DON'T DO IT!
(also for Patrice, who claimed to find poetry in my blog, and of course for uber-marsupial lover and victim of suicide roadkill, Batty)
The actual speech part of the night? Well, my old teacher mentioned my blog and Google in her thanks, so I can't say too much, as I expect I will be having Visitors.
But speaking to a room full of teenage girls - and being seated next to the actual headmaster - is not exactly relaxing, you understand.
and of course, teenage girls can't be told; the very idea is absurd.
here's my speech; it's got some reminder key phrases in capitals through it that I can't be bothered editing out right now. about to make a 35-k trek to see some friends across town - and to rescue my poor underwatered pot plants, which are no doubt 97% dessicated after a week without rain.
-THANKS
thanks/address: principal, Mrs O'Shea, teachers, parents and students.
Formalities over, I'm now going to ignore the staff and parents altogether and talk to the girls. I'm going to explain to you why your parents are completely wasting their money on your school fees.
-SUNSCREEN SONG
Some of you might be expecting something like the Sunscreen Song, which goes "class of 97, Wear sunscreen. If I could offer you only one tip for the future, sunscreen would be it. "
In fact, that was a pretty good speech, and I wish I could give it.
- ORIGINAL
But unfortunately, Patrice has asked me to come up with something original.
Actually, I'm still wondering why she did ask me to speak tonight.
- THE POINT OF ME
-pay attention
-was like you
I suppose the point of guest speakers at school events like this it that they are neither your parents nor your teachers, the idea being that you might actually pay attention to me
And the point of asking an "old girl" to speak is that 19 years ago I was a student here, presumably just like you.
-what not to do?
So maybe I'm supposed to provide some insights into where you might go and how to get there; or perhaps I'm exhibit A: here's what NOT to do.
I'm not sure how good an example I'd make anyway. Most likely all of you were born since I was last here, although I notice we have a few things in common, including Patrice.
- PAST 19 YEARS
What I've done in that 19 years includes five years as a technology journalist on The Age, about the same time writing for inner-city Melbourne papers in St Kilda, Fitzroy and Melbourne city, a bit of freelance writing, picking up arts degrees from RMIT and Melbourne University, travelling to about 15 or 20 countries (the exact number depends on whether you count Wales and Scotland and overnight stops), working in shearing sheds, a couple of brushes with the law (all at least 15 years ago) and
-YOUR OBLIGATIONS & HOW TO GET THERE
That's just for context; this isn't about me. It's about you. Other speakers tonight and through your lives will remind you that you have obligations to the wider community, to give something back from your relatively privileged positions, but I'm interested in how you'll get yourselves into a position to do that.
- a bit girly?
Patrice told me the topic for the guest speaker at your annual dinner was normally something "a bit girly", often about the co-educational experience.
- not thinking about feminism/busy being smart
Feminism is not necessarily the first thing on your minds; and I'm very glad for you that it doesn't have to be. In fact, research – and my memory of school - suggests that most of you are probably too busy being smarter and more mature than the boys your age to even think about feminism, and you may expect that to go on being the case.
-not always enough
I hope it does, but you may also find that smarter and better aren't always enough.
-fight, give in or walk away
Being female can still mean you are treated differently in a lot of situations. When that happens, you have three options: fight, give in and conform, or walk away.
- eg papers vs TV/ ACA
Being female is one reason I'm a newspaper journalist and not on TV, where I would spend more time on worrying about how I looked than what I was reporting, for instance, as I discovered when I worked as a part-time researcher on A Current Affair at Channel Nine in the late 1980s.
Still, being female isn't the only source of existential difficulty; in fact it's pretty minor when it comes to the bigger problem of being yourself.
-2022: speaking to a dinner and what will matter. not what you think.
Incredible as this might seem now, in 2022 each of you will be a Grammar "old girl", 20 years older in fact, looking back at your 2002 self. And if you're really unlucky you may even be speaking to a new batch of students at a Krome House dinner about how you fared over that 20 years.
Whatever the people around you might tell you to do, or be, now, however much you might care right now whether boys like you or not, what you weigh now, what clothes you wear now, what your marks are now, ….. the only thing that will make that experience tolerable for you is to have been true to yourselves.
-fees so you can do what you want
Your parents have – I hope – stumped up Grammar's not insignificant fees for the right reasons – not so you can be a doctor or a lawyer, but so you have the greatest possible chance of being able to do whatever you want with your lives. And to that end you, probably pay a lot of attention to your marks.
- what marks can do for you
In HSC in 1983, as it was then, my end of year mark – now a TER – was the second-highest in the class. I was supposed to go straight to Melbourne Uni and do law or something. I didn't; I spent three years hanging around Ballarat driving my parents to despair. It took those three years to work out what it was I needed and understand how to get it. Actually, that's not true. I'm still working out what I need and how to get it.
-figuring out where to go
Some of you are very lucky: you already know exactly what you want to do with your lives. Fewer again know exactly how to get there and that they have the talent, intelligence and inner resources to walk that path.
Others of you are yet to figure out what will suit you best. You may be being bombarded with career choices, information on what people "do" in different jobs, what the pay is and how good or bad the working conditions are.
But before you even think about all that, or any other decision you're faced with, you have to know what shape peg you are. If you're an artist-shaped peg, the best marks in the world are still no reason at all for going to medical school. If you really care about people and are fascinated by biology and curing diseases, you need to find a way to work with that, even if your exam results aren't that good.
-girls in technology
One of the stock stories that I trot out when I can't think of anything else to write about, is the "why don't girls study technology" yarn. I've been writing it for nearly six years now.
-underrepresented
It goes something like this: In Australia, women are hugely underrepresented in computing and communications technology work, and the "harder" or more objectively scientific the work, the fewer women you'll find. The numbers of women studying these subjects has actually gone down over recent years, while in equally left-brain fields, like engineering, the male-to- female ratio is now about 50:50.
- compared to overseas
This is a Western phenomenon; in countries like Malaysia, girls are actively encouraged to take up these high-paying, white-collar and in-demand roles, and they're very good at them.
- year 9 dropouts ... boys ... not looking too smart
It's also an age-related thing; in Australia, girls tend to drop out of computing studies around years 9 and 10 . I don't know how things are here at Grammar, but one reason for that happening is thought to be that the boys hog the computer labs, or that old chestnut, that "smart" girls aren't considered attractive or cool.
-don't let it happen here if that's what you want
I hope it doesn't happen here, but if it does, and if you think you'd like to spend more time programming, or learning to set up networks, or working out how to make databases do clever tricks, you should do it no matter waht. I'm not saying you should all go off and enrol in programming 101 tomorrow morning. If you find it boring, or just get much more excited about plants, dogs or architecture, by all means do that.
-same for everything; what gets you going?
The same principles apply; if it interests you, if it can make you stay up an extra hour to solve that problem or finish that piece of work, then it could be what you are here for. And if that thing happens to be a bit more domestic, like making your family your first priority, you're allowed to do that too.
- change your mind
And – here's a very girly bit – if you change your mind halfway through, that's perfectly fine too. It's still a woman's prerogative to change her mind, and it should be a man's too.
- attributions of success
Here's another random snippet of research I picked up somewhere: in general, when men succeed they take full credit, and when they fail, they blame outside factors. In women, it's the opposite: when they fail, they often blame themselves, while success is put down to luck or outside help. The result is not just stronger male egos; it's greater willingness to try scary things, because if they fail, it's not really their fault, is it?
- you get lots of help... school and family...and high expectations.
Being at Ballarat Grammar means you're getting a lot of outside academic help with your studies, and what's called pastoral support from your house. It's not accidental that the houses are divided along gender lines, either.
And whatever the ups and downs, you're getting a lot of help from your families – there's those fees again – but more importantly there's the home environment that lets you grow and study and most likely test yourselves out against your parents' standards. There's the expectations, too – positive in that they push you harder, but potentially negative if you feel you have to live up to something that isn't you.
- but it's still your life...light bulb joke
For all that help, your life is still entirely yours. Nothing I say, or your parents say, or the teachers say, is going to make any difference to who you really are.
It's like that old light bulb joke: How many social workers does it take to change a light bulb? Only one, but the light bulb has to WANT to change.
- art and definining your own success/potential.
- which fees can't buy
If you fail or succeed, it may be due to outside factors or not. When I was here in the early 80's, I studied art – I was terrible at making art but I enjoyed it – and one thing stuck with me. We were taught that although we might like or not like a piece of art, we also had to try to understand it from the point of view of the artist – what he or she was trying to achieve.
No one else could define that for them; it was their art, whether or not other people saw it the same way. Your lives are the same; when you're an "old girl" you'll find you care less and less about what other people think, but more about meeting your own standards and fulfilling your own potential, as you choose to define it.
Which is something no amount of school fees can buy; you have to do it for yourself.
- last year's VCE - St Kevin's - willing to do the work, and cared about his marks.
Last year's top VCE result went to a boy who was, admittedly, at St Kevin's college in Toorak; but he was on a scholarship and it took him an hour and a half to get to school every day. To me, that says he was willing to do the work that was needed, regardless of his circumstances. It also means that he must have cared about his VCE results an awful lot.
- ignore me, but trust me on the sunscreen.
And, as that song said, you should be careful about whose advice you take. so feel free to ignore me.
But trust me on the sunscreen
Wednesday, October 09, 2002
blogon
Sapphire Blue
"There is no drama. No blogger rivalry turned ugly, no broken heart, no creepy stalker guy with fifty-seven AOL screen names.
"I just really got to hate my website ... but as long as there was my nifty little home-built CMS there to make it just so easy to update, I would update.
"And then I would think: I really hate my website.
"And then a few days would go by, while I thought of tearing it all down, starting over nostalgic and wistful for 1999, just like everyone else. And then I'd do it again. So here endeth the vicious circle.
"When I come up with something I don't hate, you'll be the first to know."
This means we'll never know if Michelle continued to be able to say she'd seen every panda bear in the US, or if she ever got bored with the view of the Washington Monument from her desk.
You can still browse her picture gallery of cats (named Pixel, Garfield and Quaalude), crocuses and fireworks.
I Hate Married People
"Way too many folks I know IRL (in real life) are armed with browsers and basic information retrieval skills. Find my site they do," writes media personality Helen Razer.
So, as of late August, she has abandoned her lively blog and gone to "an undisclosed locale" which BlogOn is yet to ferret out.
If you come across a blog full of complex sentences and two long words where one short one would do, that'll be Helen. But don't tell any of her friends, admirers or former employers, all of whom seemed to cramp her style.
People are Stupid
With a name like that, and a subtitle reading "a steaming pile of bitter observations", you'd hardly be surprised that this blogger eventually quit. Even the person producing it could easily get tired of this tone of voice:
"Blogs are for losers.
"I've decided that I can think of nothing worth writing, and if I could, it would deserve a more noble place of record than the Internet. I do not wish to add to the stink of this toilet ... I've grown to love you during our short season together but really, I must go."
When blogging, he or she liked to paraphrase the New York Times' front page (blah blah blah) and post fake personal ads online for no clear reason except laughing at the responses.
He or she does have some redeeming niceness; a fondness for Beethoven to the point where one posts lists why each favourite is good, and ... well, that's about it in the niceness department, actually.
Damn the Pacific
This is more a blog with a broken heart than a dead one.
It was set up to support the Internet romance of a Melbourne lad, Stu, and an American girl, Lane.
Contributions to their air ticket fund and general cheering from the sidelines were encouraged by their out-loud online yearnings. Now they're "taking a few months off" and refunds for the planned second flight are being offered.
The archives have been taken down, but both Stu and Lane have blogs of their own, linked to Damn the Pacific.
It looks like they're coping OK.
Sapphire Blue
"There is no drama. No blogger rivalry turned ugly, no broken heart, no creepy stalker guy with fifty-seven AOL screen names.
"I just really got to hate my website ... but as long as there was my nifty little home-built CMS there to make it just so easy to update, I would update.
"And then I would think: I really hate my website.
"And then a few days would go by, while I thought of tearing it all down, starting over nostalgic and wistful for 1999, just like everyone else. And then I'd do it again. So here endeth the vicious circle.
"When I come up with something I don't hate, you'll be the first to know."
This means we'll never know if Michelle continued to be able to say she'd seen every panda bear in the US, or if she ever got bored with the view of the Washington Monument from her desk.
You can still browse her picture gallery of cats (named Pixel, Garfield and Quaalude), crocuses and fireworks.
I Hate Married People
"Way too many folks I know IRL (in real life) are armed with browsers and basic information retrieval skills. Find my site they do," writes media personality Helen Razer.
So, as of late August, she has abandoned her lively blog and gone to "an undisclosed locale" which BlogOn is yet to ferret out.
If you come across a blog full of complex sentences and two long words where one short one would do, that'll be Helen. But don't tell any of her friends, admirers or former employers, all of whom seemed to cramp her style.
People are Stupid
With a name like that, and a subtitle reading "a steaming pile of bitter observations", you'd hardly be surprised that this blogger eventually quit. Even the person producing it could easily get tired of this tone of voice:
"Blogs are for losers.
"I've decided that I can think of nothing worth writing, and if I could, it would deserve a more noble place of record than the Internet. I do not wish to add to the stink of this toilet ... I've grown to love you during our short season together but really, I must go."
When blogging, he or she liked to paraphrase the New York Times' front page (blah blah blah) and post fake personal ads online for no clear reason except laughing at the responses.
He or she does have some redeeming niceness; a fondness for Beethoven to the point where one posts lists why each favourite is good, and ... well, that's about it in the niceness department, actually.
Damn the Pacific
This is more a blog with a broken heart than a dead one.
It was set up to support the Internet romance of a Melbourne lad, Stu, and an American girl, Lane.
Contributions to their air ticket fund and general cheering from the sidelines were encouraged by their out-loud online yearnings. Now they're "taking a few months off" and refunds for the planned second flight are being offered.
The archives have been taken down, but both Stu and Lane have blogs of their own, linked to Damn the Pacific.
It looks like they're coping OK.
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